I Held A Little Baby Yesterday

I held a one month old little boy yesterday and the world, it stopped.

I held a little baby yesterday and realized that this was going to be me with my son in 5 months.

I held a little baby yesterday and wanted everyone else to go away so I could sit with him and just soak him in and think about how our little boy will be just like him. The tiny little fingers, the perfect little mouth, the sweet smell of his head, his pink lips smacking in hunger.

I held a little baby yesterday and discovered that everything that I have been worrying and stressing about: our car not being big enough, the furniture in the baby room not matching, my body never being the same, not having enough time before I go back to work, putting our son in daycare, none of it matters.

I held a little baby yesterday and remembered why I wanted to be a mother in the first place.

Valentine's Day

We have officially decided to do nothing for Valentine's day. However, I did tell Brian that if he wanted to "surprise" me with amazing chocolate's from a specific chocolatier in town (don't worry, I told him where the store was) I would be a very happy woman. I will probably also get him a little something, like chocolates from a specific chocolatier in town, so I can eat half the box, just kidding, I will get my own box.

We are going to have a special Valentine's day dinner at home though. I am excited to cook, I haven't cooked very many big yummy meals since I got knocked up. No energy and feeling crappy means the kitchen is the last place I want to hangout. Two weekends ago I made a rack of lamb with roasted potatoes and chocolate souffles. I was really excited to sit down and eat a great meal with Brian. Just as I was pulling the lamb out of the oven Brian got a fire call. The lamb was excellent but I ate it all alone. The call ended up just being a bonfire in someone's backyard, so he came home within 45 minutes but I was still really disappointed! And the souffles, they were a disaster, they bubbled over and didn't really rise, and then I burnt them, really bad.

Hopefully the Valentine's dinner will go better. Brian requested ribs and Czech dumplings. I was thinking this rib recipe from The Pioneer Woman, the dumpling's, and some yummy veggie that I have yet to decide. I am also going to try to attempt some sort of desert. I was thinking a heart shaped chocolate torte or cake...or something. If you know of a good, fun recipe let me know!

Misery and Belly Buttons

I think I have hit that stage where I am starving all the time. Unfortunately I haven't found the best way to cure the hunger. Yesterday afternoon I tried to have a "snack" before dinner of chips and salsa. I was still starving so then we ordered Chinese for dinner. I had half a plate of Chinese and felt like I was going to EXPLODE, and I mean my belly was stretching so bad, I felt like this lady.

(Really all I can say is OH MY GOD! And I realize that no other clothes would fit, but who would wear a bikini when you belly looks like this?)

On a different note, while I was in pain because I ate way to much I noticed that my bellybutton is totally stretched to the max, like on the inside, very weird. I tried to show Brian, but he has this weird anti bellybutton thing. He can't stand it when I act like I am going to put my finger in his bellybutton and he freaks out when I actually do it. Once tried to do it when he was sleeping because he was snoring and he actually groaned and twitched. He was totally creeped out when I told him in the morning what happened...I am evil!

Anyway this anti bellybutton thing means that he can't even watch me put my finger in my bellybutton, or listen to me talk about all the crazy things going on with it without getting the hebejeebies. So I have no sympathy/comradery with anything going on in my belly button. Poor me! Where is my sister or mom when I need someone else to annoy/creep out?

How far along? 22 Weeks 2 Days
Total weight gain/loss: Up 7lbs since my 8 week appointment.
Maternity Clothes? Not totally but pants that aren't get really uncomfortable after awhile.

Sleep: I have been waking up early a lot and then not being able to fall back asleep.
Best moment this week: Finding out that we are having a boy!

Movement: We were watching the first NASCAR race of the season last night and eating pizza and I felt Baby move from the outside for the first time. If that isn't an indicator that he is going to be just like his dad then I don't know what is! I am also feeling him roll a lot, it is such a weird feeling.
Food Craving: Coffee ice cream milkshakes....mmmmm
Gender: Boy!
Labor Signs: Some more Braxton Hicks this weeks but nothing major.
Symptoms: Peeing a lot, feeling baby move and not fitting into my pants anymore.
Belly button in or out: In but getting shallower.
What I miss: Drinking. I kind of want a beer right now.
What I am looking forward to: Painting the babies room and going to Minnesota.
Milestones: Finding out that we are having a boy and feeling baby move from the outside!

I Can't Be Trusted

Since I have been pregnant, I can't be trusted to go to the grocery store alone. Brian knows this, but he has not learned this. I am the one who ends up usually running to the grocery store on the way home from work for things like milk, spaghetti noodles, cheese, eggs...you know the normal. I am also the one who ends up coming home from the store with milk, frosted animal cookies, pickles, popcorn, cheese cake mix, chocolate milk and soup (for lunch tomorrow, or course!)

Every time this happens I think, oh my goodness, why do I let myself go to the store alone? And every time it happens and Brian helps me put away the groceries he says, "what is all this? You really can't go to the store by yourself!" I just tell him, "I know, I really can't control it! Want a frosted animal cookie? They're good, I ate some on the way home!"

It's A.....

Boy!!

He Has his feet over his head and you can see a

little row of toes and then the hand below that!

I already think that he is completely adorable!

Brian and I are so excited that we will be welcoming a son into our family in June. I had an intuition all along that baby was a boy. Seeing him on the ultrasound though and knowing that he was actually a he was sort of shocking. I think that I am still adjusting to the thought of a boy.

It was so neat to see him on the ultrasound again. Yesterday he was sleeping and curled up so the ultrasound tech was having a hard time getting good pictures of him. I had to get up and move around and the tech had to end up tilting the bed toward my head to try and get him to move. He barely moved. So we got to go back in this morning and see him again before the doctor's appointment to try and get the shots she needed. This morning he was in a great position and we got some really good pictures.

He seemed so much more real when we got to see him reacting to what the tech was doing. Like putting his hand in front of his face when the tech pushed in hard and other things. The tech said that he looked great and healthy and everything is measuring right on time with growth and all that good stuff. When we got done and were waiting for the doctor I was telling Brian that the next time we see our baby will be when he comes out in June. How weird and exciting and scary!

The rest of our weekend was pretty uneventful. We stayed home most of the weekend cleaning and working on little projects around the house. We must have done 9 loads of laundry on Saturday. It was one of those weeks when all the sheets and other little things needed to be washed. If felt good to get so much done around the house